It’s that time of year again: semester grades. And in honor of the occasion, we thought that – on behalf of the student body – we’d give President Ray a grade of his own, representative of his first semester here at Elmhurst.
So without further delay, we’d like to say congratulations to the president on a strong first semester – by the power vested in us, we’re giving you an A-. You’ve earned it by running a transparent administration and by involving students in your decision-making process.
Keep it up.
Like the numerous e-mails you’ve sent us, asking us to review your strategic plan to make Elmhurst what college ought to be – that’s good stuff. Even if you don’t get a lot of responses, we really appreciate the asking. It serves the two-pronged purpose of making us feel respected by you and of irreparably cluttering our inboxes.
And keep talking to The Leader. We’re always happy to print the things you send us, like that novel you wrote us about why we shouldn’t lower the drinking age. Not since Atlas Shrugged has a piece been so lengthy or in-depth. And even though half of our editorial staff didn’t agree with you, we were really happy to have a president who values us enough to keep us in the loop about what he was thinking.
However, as you may have noticed, we gave you an A minus. You’re doing great, but you’re not perfect. For example, your emergency alert system needs work. We just now received the text message warning us about the gunman Safia Jilani saw in Schaible.
And we understand that you’re on top of things and want to hit the ground running and all that jazz – really, we respect you for that. But you can take a breath every now and then, pausing long enough for us to at least skim your proposals. It’s like you’re a Jimmy Johns commercial – you move really really fast. Slow down – you’re doing 65 in a school zone.
That said, there are some things we’re glad you’re moving fast on – a potential new office for The Leader, Native American studies courses entering the curriculum and the like – these are things that you can move as fast on as you like.
Also, it’s great that you’re going to all of the lectures and whatnot. But we hope that you’re finding the time to score those nifty grants for the school, too. We like those. We want a lot of ‘em.
Yeah, all that seems pretty critical, but don’t worry – you’re doing a good job so far. You’re meeting people, listening to people. And we especially applaud you for speaking at the anti-hate rallies and for your proactive role in denouncing hate on campus.
You’ve been tested early and often in your first semester, and you’ve passed with flying colors. But don’t forget that there is always room to improve.